June 2012
767 posts
Chris Hemsworth doing impressions of the Avengers
emilianadarling:
massivedynamic101:
Tony Stark
The Hulk
Captain America
Loki
More Loki
Nick Fury
THIS IS LITERALLY THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN OH MY GOD.
“I am a fanboy first and an actor second.”
– Tom Hiddleston [x] (via homoforjojo)
A while ago in my AP Chemistry class, this one...
Dude,
eriksens:
I wish I could just negotiate with the spiders in...
Me: Okay well I really hate killing you guys and I know that without you the world would be overrun with insects, so I love you and all, but I kind of really need to take a shower and I don't wanna drown you or have you panic and bite me.
Spider: No probs bro I'll just go hang around in that corner until you're done. By the way, your fan is getting really dirty, my cousin's been living in there and he's not so happy with the conditions.
Me: Oh that's okay I'll have it cleaned and just you can just tell him to move out until it's done.
Spider: Sure thing, man, I'll be over here until your shower's over.
Watching 'Thor' with my Dad, part 3
Dad: Wait, Loki's destroying all the frost giants even though he is one?
Me: Yup.
Dad: Why?
Me: He's trying to prove to his father, and by extension all of Asgard, that he's really one of them and that he's worthy and mansome like Thor. Also, self-loathing.
Dad: If I were his dad, this wouldn't have happened.
Me: If you were Loki's dad, our children would be born without eyelids.
Later
Dad: OH NO
Me: Calm it down, dad.
Dad: HE'S CRYING AGAIN. I HATE IT WHEN HE CRIES. MAKE HIM STOP.
Me: *sigh* Oh, would that I could.
Dad: Do you think if I gave Odin a cow and some goats he would agree to have Loki marry you so you can make sure he never cries again?
Me: First of all, you live in the suburbs and have no livestock to speak of. Second, probably not, as I am a commoner and kind of gross-looking. Third, I strongly object to the prospect of being bartered.
Dad: You're right.
Me: Thank you.
Dad: I'd probably have to give him two cows.
Later
Dad: Loki just did a pole dance.
Me: *laugh*
Dad: He sits with his legs spread like a cheap strumpet and he twirls on a pole.
Me: *laugh*
Dad: Loki's a slut.
Later
Thor: *pins Loki down with Mjolnir*
Dad: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Loki: *yell* *squirm* *grunt*
Dad: HAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOD HAHAHAHAHA!
Later
Loki: I could have done it, father!
Dad: Oh my god.
Odin: No, Loki.
Dad: SHUT UP ANTHONY HOPKINS YOU NEGLECTFUL ASSHOLE. IF LOKI WERE MY SON I WOULD BE NICE TO HIM.
Me: *ruptures internal organs trying not to laugh*
Loki: ...
Dad: OH NO OH NO OH NO
Loki: *lets go of the spear*
Dad: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Thor: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Odin: No.
Dad: DAMNIT ODIN YOU AREN'T UPSET ENOUGH
Me: Dad, don't give yourself a palpitation.
Later
Dad: WTF Loki just comitted suicide and these assholes are throwing a feast and partying.
Me: ...
Dad: Assholegard!!!!
THE END
Reblog if you want an Anon's honest opinion of... →
bowiesnippleantennae:
cosplayerpip:
...
buttsmith:
“wake up”
“the house is on fire”
“the TARDIS just landed in the backyard”
imjustonekid:
Mom saw porn on the dash.
“Are those people’s butts??”
“Ohhh, it’s just my dash so I can’t control what people put on it…so it might’ve been.” (it was clearly butts)
“Well, you should put a message on there that says ‘no butts please’.”
OKAY. EVERYONE. NO BUTTS PLEASE.
NONE.
NO BUTTS.
notsuki:
WHAT IF FICTIONAL CHARACTERS THOUGHT OF US TOO.
“I love you but you’re real.”
/cries
Me: Omg why am I still single? I need a boyfriend!
Friend: Well, you know, good things come to those who wait.
Me: I DID MY WAITING! TWELVE YEARS OF IT! IN AZKABAN!!!
Friend:
Friend:
Friend: THAT. That is why you're single.
Like/Reblog if you're a Teleiophile.
orgy-of-nerdiness:
deanmadeadealwithademonand:
himmelslied:
megneato:
fuckingfangirling:
emilythenerdfighter:
solas-ar-neamh:
shoesofmoriarty:
benedicia:
your-daughter:
A Teleiophile is an adolescent or young adult which is attracted to mature adults.
lord of the flies in a nutshell
ralph: we need a fire
ralph: guys we need a fire
ralph: we really need a fire guys
ralph: guys
ralph: a fire
ralph: WE NEED ONE
jack: i have a better idea let's kill everything
bombastard:
she wears short skirts
i read fan fic
she’s cheer captain and
i’m still reading fan fic
me: i actually feel happy with everything right now
face: here's some acne
school: here's some work
friends: here's a knife in the back
parents: here's some added pressure
crush: here's my new lover
me: ok
